2011年6月15日 星期三
Discussing cause-(2) -revised
Michael Williams opened a music store on September, but after several months, he closed his store. There are several reasons why the music store closed. First of all, the location of the store was far from the shopping center. And on the way to Michael's shop, there were two music stores which were bigger and better than Michael's. Second, the varieties of CDs were only two categories that were hip-hop and rock. He didn't think about the people who love other categories. Then, his store just opened Monday to Friday from 1 to 5 p.m., but the number of people who walked past store was the most on weekends. Therefore, few people came to his store to buy CDs. Finally, Mr.Williams wouldn't accept checks or credit cards what might make the customers feel inconvenient. So, I think we should think much before we open a store.
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1.Second, the varieties of CDs were only two categories that were hip-hop and rock.
回覆刪除-->Second, its variety of CDs involved only two categories, including hip-hop and rock.
2.He didn't think about the people who love other categories.
-->He didn't consider the people who love other categories.
3.Finally, Mr.Williams wouldn't accept checks or credit cards what might make the customers feel inconvenient.
-->Finally, Mr.Williams wouldn't accept checks or credit cards, which might make the customers feel inconvenient.
4.So, I think we should think much before we open a store.
--> To conclude, these are the main reasons why he eventually closed his shop.
(結論句要呼應主旨,談到原因一事)