I think I am energetic and athletic because I like to do exercise, such as playing volleyball or basketball. I play volleyball almost every day and I enjoy playing volleyball with my friends. I also like to sing, I sing songs all the time. When I am in a bad mood or feel stressful, I do these things to make me happy and relieve myself from the stress of homework and exams. I am also optimistic and kind, when I have obstacles; I always deal with it with positive attitude. I like to make friends and help people. When I see someone who is in need, I will give my hand to them, helping people makes me feel happy.
My advantage is polite, I say hello to everyone I know. And I always say thanks to whoever helps me; on the contrary, I say sorry when I make mistakes. I hold the belief that what the way you treat a person, the person will treat you with the same way. So, I have good relationship with others.
And my motto is “A contended mind is a perpetual feast.” I think I should satisfied with what I have now because I am much more happiness than those who have no food and clothes. I already have everything what I should have, so I am appreciate for everything I have.
When I see someone who is in need, …, helping people makes me feel happy.
回覆刪除＂helping people…＂這句應該寫成獨立的句子。
I hold the belief that what the way you treat a person, the person will treat you with the same way.
覺得＂what the way＂可以寫成＂how＂。
I think I should satisfied with ...because I am much more happiness than those ...
＂more happiness＂→＂happier＂。
I already have everything what I should have, so I am appreciate for everything I have.
＂appreciated＂。
如有誤，請不吝嗇指教。
1.I think I am energetic and athletic because I like to do exercise, such as playing volleyball or basketball.
回覆刪除→such as前面不用逗點，通常在句子裡看到前面會有逗號，通常都是作為插入語，修飾作用。
2.I am also optimistic and kind, when I have obstacles; I always deal with it with positive attitude.
→分號放錯地方了，應該放在kind後面。建議把have換成face。
3.When I see someone who is in need, I will give my hand to them, helping people makes me feel happy.
→第二個逗點要換成分號。give my hand to them我不確定有沒有這個用法…個人比較常聽到lend someone a helping hand。
4.I think I should satisfied with what I have now because I am much more happiness than those who have no food and clothes.
→should後面+be。I am much more happiness我看不懂…文法有問題哦。
(以上，淺見。)
I also like to sing, I sing songs all the time.
回覆刪除→中間沒有連接詞
My advantage is polite, I say hello to everyone I know.
→同上
I think I "should satisfied with" what I have now
→should be satisfied with
I am much "more happiness" than those who have no food and clothes.
→happier
建議把when I have obstacles的have改成encounter
回覆刪除還有, helping people makes me feel happy應該自己一句
I am appreciate for everything I have不用am哦